Waves

This is a hard week. A busy week. A week of revelation.

I thought I could hold out, that I could stay busy and be about the work of getting my girl off to England. As busy as my body had been, as tired as my mind has been, I find myself waking early and repeatedly through the night. Thinking that there is something that I don't - can't - be late for. That I have to hurry so I don't miss it. Restless.

I realized Thursday that I can't keep from admitting it to myself any longer. I am going to be desperately sad with my dearest friend gone. The tears just won't stay away. They come in waves... then recede like the waves on the seashore. I don't know how I'm going to do on the big day ... but I think Faith is going to have major competition for the drama queen award.

Praise God for amazing love and support. He has really bonded Janet and I ... and is working on bonding us with Lorie. I know they are both safe places to run, when I need a woman's voice and a place to cry. No competition there! We'll all be rivers of tears together. And then there is Janice ... my safe harbor when all the lighthouses are dark. She always has a flashlight burning for me.

My sweet, precious, irreplaceable daughter...there are lessons for all of us throughout these next 4 months. Times of growing ... homesickness ... stretching .... wonder .... and a reliance upon God in ways we haven't even thought of. May I find myself as deeply immersed in His love and His word as you will be. May we both be found faithful.

I miss you soooo much already.